Author: Fireproof

I am the pastor at Crucified Church, but honestly and more importantly to me I am the husband to Lindsey and the father to Eli (8), Silas (6), and most recently our twin girls Elliston and Evans (3) . Without these 5 in my life, my ministry wouldn't be where it is today and this blog would not exist.

In the moment

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Life has been crazy.  That may be an understatement.  Life has been absolutely chaotic.  For the last month or so it seems that we have been on the run.  Starting at the end of July we had a mission team in town with 85 middle school kids setting up worksites for them, 12 in total around the area.  Imagine with me trying to lead and setup that many worksites where you are trying to teach 12-14 year olds how to use a screw gun, read a tape measure, paint, stain, cut, use a weedwacker and so forth.  Let’s just say there is still cleanup going on from kids not knowing you don’t walk across the floor when you have paint on your shoes.  Oh the joys of leading kids.  Isn’t that part of teaching the next generation though.  Yes some of these projects adults with skill could have done in an hour or so, but are we teaching the young anything if we do it all ourselves?  Projects in our home are the same way as our 4 year old twins want to help me work on the shed.  Silas, I am proud to say actually has gotten the hang of reading a tape measure, cutting with a chop saw and using a trim nailer.  (With supervision of course.)  How many adults can say they’ve never done that before.  

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Anyway, back to the thought of life being chaotic.  After mission team we had our annual camping trip to Cowan’s Gap.  All 6 of us packed into our trailer, my in-laws and my parents all camped beside each other enjoying God’s creation.  Man talk about a week.  A day at Hershey Park, biking the battlefields at Gettysburg, fishing every chance we got.  A moment that i will never forget included Eli catching a maybe 3 inch fish and singing “I am the champion,” until he realized how small it truly was.  At that moment we all just stood on the deck cracking up as we made him take a picture with his “prized catch.

Then last weekend my dad and I got to take the boys to the NASCAR race.  It has become our yearly tradition to finish off the summer by taking the boys to the race.  A final weekend spent with just them.  The truth is the race is just he excuse to have that time with them.  To hear about the things they are learning, the memories from the summer, and also picking on them asking what girls they have been kissing lately.  Moments.  Memories.  Times to be cherished while they are still at the age they want to hang out with their dad.  Maybe this is exactly what Jesus was talking about when he speaks of life abundantly, living life to the full.  Being in the moment?

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”  John 10:10 NIV

Does it mean a lot more hours at work, and late nights after getting back to everyday life?  Absolutely.  Did I at times during those trips catch myself about everything else i needed to do when getting back.  Yes, it happened at times.  I am still human and my mind wanders, but God has been working on my heart this summer on not taking things to seriously and learning to truly be engulfed in each moment.  Embracing the times and the little snippets I might have to share with my kids the “Father’s Love.” 

This past weekend I caught myself in one of those hours of just being present.  After a long day at work I got to take the kids to a block party our at Salix Bethel Church.  They had a bubble machine setup on one end of the property and inflatable water slides on the other.  For the kids that meant cover your body in bubbles and then run back to the slides using the bubbles to fly down at full speed.  (Take a moment now to remember the joy of being a kid when nothing else mattered).  Eli during that time made it his goal to give me a big bear hug every time he ran by thinking it hilarious to see how wet he could get me.  You know what happened during that hour.  I laughed, I smiled, and I just took it all in.  I forgot about everything else.  Life to the full.

I say that to you today in hope that maybe just for a moment you would take a moment with your kids or grandkids to just be present.  Put your phone down, turn off the tv, and just laugh.  Maybe you don’t have kids in your life anymore, think back to when you were a kid ripping around on your bike, or flying down a slip and slide.  All of us need moments of joy, memories.  What if today you went outside and caught yourself letting your guard down, forgetting about all your stress for a moment.  One of my greatest memories happened when I was about 10 years old.  It was over 90 degrees out and my dad’s a/c in his car went out.  That day he was driving home from Wheeling West Virginia for work and dripping in sweat.  I will never forget him pulling in the drive, climbing out in his suit and tie and just jumping in our small inflatable pool with us and just laughing away.  Is that what you need to do today?  

Just to give you a thought in closing can you imagine Jesus doing that kind of thing when he talks about let the children come to me.  He needed a break from all the noise and chaos?  A moment to just laugh.  Maybe that is even what He did when he went to the mountain by himself to pray, just embraced being in the presence of the father,  telling Dad jokes.  Sometimes we need to loosen up.  Can you imagine God one day looking at you and going, “Why so serious?”  

Matthew 19: 14Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

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“A new way to read”

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Put yourself into the story, that was the message years ago that change my life and how I learned to read Scripture.  You see up until that point I would fumble my way through the Bible, understanding bits and pieces here and there.  It was a struggle if I am being open about it.  Here I was a student at Liberty University, going for ministry yet not truly understanding how a book written so long ago could pertain to me.  I would start at the beginning and do my best, making commitment after commitment to read through it in a year only to make it a few months.  (Let’s be honest, how many of you have quit when you get to about Leviticus.)  As a new believer of only a few years I kept finding myself discouraged crying out to God, “You have called me to ministry, yet I can’t even understand your word, how am I supposed to teach it?”  Anyone else ever feel that way?  Then one day in one of our youth classes one of our professors started sharing about the best way to teach youth is to encourage them to put themself into the scene.    If the story from Scripture is talking about Jesus in the mountains, allow yourself to go to the mountains, look at your surroundings, dream of the snowcaps, the trees, the smells.  If the passage is about being by the lakeside, let yourself mind wander to taking a kayak out on the lake engaging all your senses.  Doc Vandegriff, our youth ministry professor, may have meant this lesson to be about how we teach others but it was a game changer for me.  I started to get a new passion for reading the Gospels once again, placing myself into the stories and then from there learning to take on the roles of the characters described in the story. 

Now that we have kids, reading Scripture in this way puts a whole new adventure to this idea.  Especially as we were working through the Easter story with our kids, I really tried to focus on giving our kids roles, letting them see all their personalities shine through.  Let me give you a glimpse into that to hopefully encourage you to do the same thing.  

So I started with Eli our 9 year old.  He is definitely a compassionate child, with a heart of empathy.  In school he got the “rescuer” award as the one always looking out for others.  Going through the disciples, the one I equated him best to was John, the one whom Jesus loved.  The one leaning on Jesus side during the last supper.  Originally one of the “Sons of thunder,” makes me think of someone who is calm until pressed, then stands up to protect when needed to.

Next was Silas, he was pretty easy to figure out.  If there is a word the kid lives by it is, “why.”  Can somebody say doubting Thomas?  It really has given me a new perspective on Thomas though.  We give him this description because of saying he wouldn’t believe himself without proof.  That is how I see SIlas, questioning everything, deeper thinking.  Whether it is the questions at night of “How old is God?” Then without missing a breath, “do I wear shoes in heaven?”  His questions are nonstop, that is just part of who he is.  Maybe that is what Thomas truly was like.  

Third we have Evans, one of our 4 year old twins girls.  She is without a doubt, no brainer like Peter.  I can imagine her on the boat as the storms are raging, Jesus walking on the water calling out, “Lord if it is you, I want to come on the water with you.”  Who thinks that way, she does.  If there is a risk to be taken, she is in.  And He simply responds, “Come on.”  The rest of us may be sitting in the boat looking at the risk and the circumstances going no way.  Before we know it, I can picture her in my mind, diving in without a fear in the world.  It is how she lives.  She Is our snowboarding, go cart drifting, zip lining wild child.  Getting messy and bloody doesn’t scare her at all.  (We are going to have our hands full)

Finally is Elliston.  Totally opposite of her sister, she was a tricky one to figure out.  After some reading though, I came up with the character of Mary, just sitting at Jesus feet.  Taking in every word that Jesus spoke.  When we are reading Elli wants to be right in my lap, repeating every word.  If she is awake she is our clinger, always wanting to be right with me or Lindsey, holding on to one of us, never out of sight.  Think about Mary.  Almost every story you read in the Gospels, Mary is close by.  

This may have been a bit of a different column this month but it is just a glimpse into our family.  Hopefully it brought a smile to your face or made you laugh a bit, but the main goal with it is to encourage you to read Scripture differently.  Maybe it is something new for you to try, to engulf yourself, allowing your senses to run wild.  Hopefully it will make the Bible personal to you understanding it isn’t Just a book written years ago.  It is the word of God.  

Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is alive and active.”  

Do you read it that way?

“Time with daddy”

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“What is it?” 3 simple words that have now changed my life in ways many will never understand. You see I just spent the last 3 days at Snowshoe Mountain in West Virgina with my buddy, my 9 year old Eli. He was invited to take part in a CrossTrailOutfitters (CTO) Snowboard camp. Going into the time I wasn’t really sure what to expect, I just knew I was looking forward to some one on one time with my lil man. (In a home with 4 kids, the one on one moments are rare, but so valuable for all of them.) He was the youngest kid there, but he took it like a champ getting to play the role of the younger brother for once.

With CTO they keep their retreats to 4-5 kids at a clip so that the deeper personal relationships can be built. Honestly going into it from an American Church mindset I kept thinking why not the more the merrier, why aren’t we opening it up to large groups. After being there I totally understand why as Eli now has made friends for life. The really impactful time with all these kids happens in what is known as the fireside chats. A question for the day to ponder throughout and come back to discuss at night. The question for the camp was simply 3 words, “What is it?’ I was kinda dumbfounded by how simple it was, but as the time went on, the question kept getting deeper and deeper in my mind. “What is it that brings me joy? Peace? Hope? Life? Fulfillment? What is it that get me up in the morning? Gets me agitated? What is it?”

So as we would sit around and discuss this question the answers would be all over the place with kids ranging from 16 to 9 years old. The final morning though as we were having our final chat they got to Eli and said, “Hey man, what is it?” Very boldy and proud he sad, “Time with Daddy.” I think the dust kicked up quite a bit in that moment, but at the same time and scream and shout, “Buddy that’s how I feel to.” Above the snowboarding, the mountains, the time with others, it was about our time together.

Now driving home that day I had 4 hours to think more upon this simple answer. I started wondering if God were to ask us the same question, would we have that answer. “Time with you Lord, time with Daddy.” You see I believe God is saying the same thing to us, just desiring our time. In a culture where we have made it about events, big services and let’s be blunt, busyness, how much is God craving our time? I know in life it happens and we take time together with others for granted, but I hope and pray my lil man will always have that memory of our time together and those 3 simple words.

Kinda makes you think of Mary and Martha right, Mary just sitting at Jesus feet, desiring His time. Is that us or are we so consumed with other things.

38 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

“keep it simple”

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“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink…” Matthew 25:35. The righteous reply with a simple question, when?  Matthew 25: 40, “When you did this for the least of these, you did it unto me.”  Bam!  Pretty straightforward and blunt.  

Today I want to share with you a proud Dad moment.  A little over a week ago I was taking our 4 kids to Walmart to get Valentine’s stuff for Lindsey.  In my mind it would be simple, let them each pick a card and a gift that they each thought she’d love.  Amongst all the screaming ideas in the car, I was in my own little world oblivious to what was going on around me, just hoping not to spend an hour there.  Eli on the other hand was fully alert and that included noticing the man standing outside the store with the simple sign that said, “Hungry, will you help me with food?”  At that moment instead of thinking about his mom’s valentines,  his focus shifted toward that man; let’s say obsessing over it.  “Dad, can I buy that guy some food?  I have my own wallet.”  He exclaimed with joy taking over.  “Bud, you don’t have to pay, I can, but yes we can get him some things.”  He looked at me for a few moments like staring into my soul, “Dad, I said I have my wallet and this is something I want to do.”  Who am I to argue with that, like him saying, don’t steal my blessing dad.  

After about 10 minutes picking out flowers, cards and gifts for Linds, Eli again was laser focused.  He had time to think about what he wanted.  Chicken Poppers, Reese’s and a bottle of water.  Perfect, covering all the major food groups in our home.  Silas also had to throw in 2 apples for good measure.  Normally to get our kids out of Walmart is like a pulling teeth, an hour long ordeal after looking at toys.  Not that day, they were running to the checkout worried the man was no longer going to be there.  “Dad, dad, there he is,” all four kids screamed including the twins.  As I pull up to him, Eli jumps into the front seat so both he and Silas have a window they can reach out.  “Hey sir, hey sir we have stuff for you!”  The excitement in their faces and the joy in the man made it all worth it.  As they explained to him that they bought it with their own money, I swear it looked like the guys eyes were tearing up.  

Driving away from that moment Silas had one of his deep thoughts like normal.  “Dad, is that how we live Jesus?  Like is that what you mean when you say we can live out the Bible?”  Absolutely, the simplicity of a child’s mind.  They get it.  To be honest though, how many of us as adults would overthink it.  We’d see the sign asking for help then start thinking about the guys story wondering if he deserves it?  Is he really hungry or just trying to get my money?  How many other people already gave him food?  The list of excuses could go on and on.  

To a child it was as simple as “dad he is holding up a sign saying I am hungry, can we feed him?”

I know I learned something that day.  Maybe we overcomplicate the Gospels at times when Jesus is being pretty straightforward and blunt.  What if at times we started thinking like a child, going here is the need, how can we meet it.  Hope this challenges your thinking, and makes you laugh.  

“LET THEM GO”

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Let them go.

This is the year where our twins are getting way more independent.  I know they are only 4 but it seems like they are teenagers already.  Forming their own personalities, and lets just say we are learning that we are going to be in for a crazy time, especially with Evans.  She is our Spiderman loving, wild child.  Our risk taker, push you to your limits child.  This includes sled riding.  Up until this year both girls either wanted us on the sled with them or were scared to do the “Big Hill.”  Not anymore.  Evans now is at the spot where she will yell at you, “I go by myself.”  That has been a challenge for me.  I can’t honestly tell you why, besides that these are my lil girls, and maybe I am just not ready for it yet.  (The boys on the other hand, go for it, the earlier they could get on a snowboard the better.)   With this reality I know it means that she will take some falls, she will get a bloody lip or two and tears will be shed.  I have also had to come to the grips that as she gets older Lindsey and I will have to entrust her to try things on her own.  We can hold the tube, we can point her in the right direction, but eventually we have to let her go.  So as I shout to her nervously, “You got this baby girl” I have to start believing it myself.  

The first few times watching her fly down the hill right towards the jump I was nervous.  Grabbing my board to be on the ready to chase down after her, I would wait anxiously at the top watching her fly though the air waiting to hear if she started crying.  Out of amazement though all I would hear would be wild laughter and smiling, “I DID IT, I DID IT.”  Now she is hooked, asking everyday, “Big Hill?  Big Hill?”  

Do I still get nervous, without a doubt.  Has she taken some falls, oh yeah, with tears to follow.  Follow by, “I go again.”  

I don’t know why this is hitting me so hard lately but is this how Jesus felt when sending out the disciples for the first time.  Taking that step from watching over them, teaching them, showing them how to do ministry.  To now entrusting them to do it on their own.  Would they fail at times, would they always do it the way he taught them?  Would he trust them?  

The Bible doesn’t give us a time frame for how long the disciples were with Him before sending them out, but we know it was under three years, most likely within a year of being with Him.  I can only imagine the thoughts going through His mind, are they ready?  “Well, maybe Peter is but Matthew how about a little more training.  John, you are good but Judas, yeah your personality doesn’t really line up.  We don’t get any of that, it just says He sent them out in groups of 2. 

In Mark 6: 7 it says, “He called the disciples together and began sending them out two by two, giving them power to cast out spirits.”  In Luke 10 we read of Him sending 72 more.  Entrusting them with the message.  Were they all ready?  Did they have all the proper training?  This information we do not know.  What we do know is that He empowered them and He entrusted them.  He is still entrusting us and empowering us to this day to carry His message. 

Just as we had to get to a spot in life of emtrusting Evans with that inner tube to go by herself.  Now the beauty in all of this is hearing her talk about it when she gets home, the joy in her voice telling Lindsey all about how far she flew through he air.  The testimony of what she just accomplished.  

This again is true of the disciples, in Luke 10: 17 it tells us how the disciples joyfully returned excited to share all they had seen God do.  So as I wrap this up today do you realize that God is still entrusting and empowering you with His message?  Do yo still get excited to share all that you are seeing God do in your life?  He is alive and at work all around you, will you be the one too say God I am ready, send me.   

Birthday Celebrations

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Birthdays.  A day to celebrate, to be put in the spotlight.  (Let’s be honest for some people they now call it their birthday month.)  This past week we celebrated both our boy’s birthdays as Eli turned 9 and Silas turned 7.  When they were younger we could get away with one party to celebrate both of them, but now they are at the age they both desire to have their own.  Talk about chaos in our home.  Not only was it Thanksgiving last week but we also had parties on Friday and Sunday night.  Our house is only so big, so this year we had to make the choice to let them each invite 3 of their friends from school because until you get all our family there, our house was overrun.  Each night around 20-25 guests were packed in to make them feel special.  Noise, noise, noise as kids ran everywhere with Nerf guns, playing hide and seek.  I think my hearing is still coming back, nope, ears are still ringing.  Okay maybe that is a little exaggeration.

When it came time for the cake though, it was their moment.  Everyone joining together in singing, lifting them up.  The spotlight.  The celebration.  Remembering their birth.  At this moment I cold go different directions with this devotion including celebrating Jesus brith, praising His name, and putting him in the spotlight.  Yet the thought that keeps coming to my mind is how as we celebrate our birthday, God knew us and designed us before we even took our first breath.   Imagine with me now as the crowd was gathered singing Happy Birthday, God himself being in that crowd singing along.  Maybe I am stretching it a bit, but hear these verses.  

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand— when I awake, I am still with you.” Psalms 139

In Psalms 139 David speaks of God knowing our inmost being, knitting us together in our mother’s womb, knowing our thoughts and our days before one even came to be.  Have you ever stopped and considered that?  His thoughts about us being endless.  The God of the universe caring about you, knowing you, celebrating you.  You are His beloved, His creation.  

Stop a moment to think about that, the God of all looking down on you, and I can picture Him smiling away.   With that thought in mind, it is out of that love and desire for you that He sent His son to die for you.  So you might live.  So next time you are in worship, celebrating Him, think about Him smiling down on you, saying I gave it all for this relationship.  I know personally, that thought has changed the way I worship.  It is no longer just me looking to the sky hoping to catch His ear for a moment.  But it is a relationship.  God desiring to hear my voice, and also Him speaking back to me! 

That’s not fair

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That’s not fair.

A little over a week ago now, our boys had off from school on Thursday and Friday for parent teacher conferences.  Needless to say, even though they were off Silas still managed to be wide awake at 6 am.  Here we are still sold asleep with our alarms not going off for at least another half hour, only to find him staring over our bed, waiting for us to move.  Startled Lindsey rolls over with a small shriek telling him to go back to bed.  Instead he just keep standing there, then quietly asks if he can put a show on.  Then it got interesting, as my wife made a comment to the affect of, “Silas maybe you should go to work for me and I will stay home now that you are up already.”  Without missing a beat he looks around and then answered, “Mommy sometimes life isn’t fair.  You just have to do what you don’t always want to.”  Hearing all this I couldn’t help laugh but was also waiting for the thud to hit the floor if she threw him across the room.  Eventually we did get up, both of us head to work, as the kids got to stay home and hang out with their grandparents.  

Throughout the day that phrase “it’s not fair” kept running through my mind.  How many times have we all said that.  In a home with 4 kids we hear it all the time.  How many times as adults do we stay it though also.  Maybe when someone gets that promotion or has the nice house.  When someone gets the new car or what seems like the dream life.  That’s not fair.  Then we take it one step further and start compiling to God about it.  God why did you answer their prayer and not mine.  Why did you heal them and not me?  God why did you bless them with kids and not us… You get my point.  “It’s Not Fair,”  as we gripe and complain.  

Then of course my mind starts thinking about it in a biblical perspective.  The older son in the prodigal son story.   He has watched his younger brother pretty much betray the family, break his father’s heart, squander everything, and just up and leave.  Yet when he decided after years to come back home, this same heartbroken father is going to celebrate and throw him a party. Can you hear it with me now, the pity party of him chanting, “It’s not fair.”  

Against his son’s desire I can imagine the father sitting down with him, let’s call him Johnny for our story,  at that moment and saying let’s talk.  “Johnny, you have been with me the whole time.  Did you ever mess up?”  Reluctantly, Johnny tries to play it off, looking all over the room except at the father and saying, “Yes.”  Can you imagine the tension in the room at that moment, oh to be a fly on the wall.  “Johnny, have we shown you grace and love the whole time your brother was gone?”  Again in muttering… “Yes.”  The conversation then continues on for about 10 more minutes of questions back and forth, until the Father finally explains that grace looks different for every person.  But at the heart of grace is the Father’s love.  

To explain it one step further, I tried to put myself into the story as the older son, complaining to God saying it’s not fair.  At that point he led me out to a fire pit to have a talk.  (I don’t know why, but in my life it seems the most honest conversations happen around a fire). Then God started to speak as the Father, “Was it fair that my perfect child died on a cross for you?  Is that fair? Is it fair, that you deserve death in your sins, yet I am giving you the free gift of eternal life?”  Again the questioning goes on for a while only to make me realize that I am so grateful that grace isn’t fair or comprehendible, but it is amazing.  That’s what makes it grace.   It goes beyond reason the God himself desires a relationship with me, that he would sacrifice His son.  

So this Thanksgiving think about grace, all that God has done for you.  If you catch yourself griping or complaining about something not being fair, think of what Jesus did for you and let that transform your heart to a heart of gratitude.  

“The same, yet oh so different”

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HOT TUB TIME. It’s that time of year for our family, and our kids couldn’t be more excited.  The changing leaves, the playing outside, the chill in the air, fires, so many different things that we all look forward to. (Time change, not so much.)  On top of all that we do look forward to, it is the time of year of setting the hot tub up for the winter.  Our family swimming pool, or as Lindsey would call it, “our time of noise and chaos.”  The kids have been asking for a few weeks now, so this past week I was able to get it ready to go.  Now, as I have shared before the word patience doesn’t really exist in our home so telling them they had to wait for the water to heat up they couldn’t get through their minds.  Every single day for three days straight they would feel the water and then get upset why it wasn’t ready yet, oh the anticipation.

Finally, it was time and next thing I knew all 4 kids were changed and diving in.  Water going everywhere, not realizing how much bigger they had gotten.  The screaming and noise had commenced.  As we were sitting there, all our heads now completely soaked the twins got in their mind that my hair needed cut, and they wanted to be the hairstylists.  (Come on dad, of course wet hair must equal a haircut). I told you they have an imagination.  Talk about an experience.  Ellie was all gentle about it, pushing my hair back, to the side, staring at me about 5 inches from my face, while pretending to cut a little bit at a time.  After a few minutes she smiled and said all done.  Going along with it, I said “thank you so much, how’s it look?”  Out of nowhere she replied with a giggle, “like a unicorn.”

Next thing I know Evi starts yelling and hip-checks Ellie out of the way, “my turn, my turn” as she begins yanking at my head back and forth.  Where Ellie was gentle and clam, Evi was anything but that.  I could feel it in my neck, with my hair getting pulled out.  I was honestly thinking I was going to find clumps of the little hair I have left in her hands.   Within a minute or so, I had to stop her with a more sarcastic, “oh thank you, how did it turn out?”  Instead of the little giggle like her sister, Evi more steamed at me, “Like a dinosaur!”  

What a difference between the two.  Even though they are identical twins, their personalities at this point are completely opposite.  Ellie is our dress up like a ferry unicorn for Halloween, gentle, play with dolls twin.  Evi, on the other hand hand, is going to be our wild child.  Spiderman, get covered in mud, tackle my sister, rough-houser.  How can they be so different.  We raise them the exact same way, they look exact, and most times it is hard to tell them apart.  I may have a 50-50 chance at times to get them right.  That is until personalities kick in.

Sitting there afterwards for a few moments though I kept thinking about how great it is that they are different, that we are all different.  How marvelous it is that God designed us all with different gifts and personalities.  Every trait, every aspect, He has shaped in His hand.  Can you imagine with me a world where we all looked, acted, and responded in the same way.  Can you say boring with me, a bunch of robots.  In God’s master plan, He created us all unique, one of a kind.  Some as rough-housers and some as gentle.  All designed in His hand.

Praise God that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, so are you!  Will you take a moment to praise Him now for that?

Psalms 139: 13-14, “YOU CREATED MY INMOST BEING, YOU KNIT ME TOGETHER IN MY MOTHER’S WOMB. I PRAISE YOU FOR I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE; YOUR WORKS ARE WONDERFUL.”

“it’s too loud!”

Posted on by Fireproof

“It’s so loud in here.”  Ellie exclaims as she yells and adds to the noise.  Having a house with 4 kids and 2 dogs get noisy at times.  Actually noisy isn’t quit the right word.  Maybe It gets a little loud.  No, that doesn’t quite describe it either.  Deafening, maybe that is a bit closer to the noise decibels coming out of our home at times.  To give you a glimpse when Silas was an infant we used to call his cry a  pterodactyl scream thinking it couldn’t get any louder.  So now just imagine adding both twins screaming at the same time on top of that.  (Can I say hearing aids will be in my near future.)  With all that screaming there are moments where it is so loud, you can’t hear anything.  Crazy how that works right?  So much noise that you can’t distinguish any of what is actually being said.  “Chocolate Milk, Apple Juice, Chicken, He’s touching me, Stop, He poked me, she’s copying me, and on and on it goes.”  Wait a second, there are more voices here than just our kids, and then we notice the 4-5 neighbor kids all going in the madness thinking it is hilarious.

I hate to say it but there are times with all the noise Lindsey and I cant hear what is being asked for and it goes unnoticed.  Within 5 minutes or so Eli or Silas will come to us upset asking “Did you get my drink?”  Feeling bad in that moment I normally will reply with, “Buddy did you ask e for any?”  After a glare, the simple response of, “Yeah, but you must not have heard me.”  Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t, or maybe there was just to much noise to tell the difference.  “I’m sorry bud, I must not have heard you amongst the noise of everyone asking.  

You ever think about prayer that way.  That your voice is just one in a million calling out to God all at once.  You begin to feel like they are just hitting the wall amongst all the noise in the world.  Or that your prayers aren’t as vital or important as someone else crying out in the midst of a hurricane or medical diagnosis.  

I know there have been times in our homes where the kids will feel like we just don’t care, but the reality is we just don’t hear them.  

Let me tell you something now and please hear me very carefully.  Even amongst all the noise and prayers going up, God hears you specifically.  He knows your voice and is listening.  Even though you may feel that there are others crying out for other things, you are just as valuable.  

He designed you, he created you, he wants to hear from you.  Just as we want to hear from and speak with all of our kids, how much greater is the heavenly Father’s love for you.  

Maybe it is just as simple as crying out saying, “Lord, I need you.”   Pulling at the pant leg of God just as our girls do when they really want our attention and allowing Him to reach down to be the comfort.  Picture that with me now.  Here you are crying out, “Lord, Lord” and He is reaching down picking you up like a little child.  

You are not just one in a billion voices to Him.  You have a name, a voice, a story.  Cry out to Him like He hears you today and watch as He answers.

Psalms 39:12, “Hear my prayer, Lord, listen to my cries for help! Don’t ignore my tears.”

“Say What?”

Posted on by Fireproof

As I sit here and write, sometimes I wish there was a way to have video of my emotions because I can’t always capture into words what I am sharing.  From the beginning I always said I wanted this to be posts of brutal honesty about our family and a glimpse into our world of chaos.  Which leads into laughter, tears, joy, excitement, anger, everything.  This is our life encapsulated into what my limited vocabulary has to offer.  

Today’s story is one of those ones that I can’t make up.  A little over two weeks ago now, Lindsey and I were having a date night.  A moment we were looking forward to, which included dropping the kids off at her parents for a sleepover.  After making sure we had everything packed we loaded up our kids and headed out towards there house.  About 5 minutes before we got there Ellie started screaming her head off, like a curdling, something is wrong type scream.  I am starting to think in my mind a be stung her or got in the car.  Wondering if I needed to pull over, Lindsey unbuckled, turned around to find her pulling at her shoulder straps on her corset like something was wrong.  “Ellie, calm down, talk to us.”  All the while I keep thinking in my mind selfishly, “Dangit, there goes our date night.”  The response that came from the mouth of our sweet 3 year old caught us totally off guard.  Through her tears she started saying these words clear as can be, “My nuts hurt, my nuts hurt.”  Tell me you’re not laughing right now.

Trying to comprehend what we were hearing Lindsey and I just looked at each other dumbfounded.  I don’t remember who started to respond but I remember it was 3 parted.  “First, keep your seatbelt on, we are almost there.  Second, you don’t have nuts.  Third, where in the world did you hear that. Back to point 2, you don’t have nuts.”  Eli then informed us that one of the neighbor kids has been screaming it and saying it over and over.  Now it makes sense.  As a 3 year old she is just picking up on what she hears, truth or not and making it her reality.  Believing in that moment that her response should be his.  He screams, this is what he says.  So now I am screaming, this should my response.  

You may be wondering where in the world I am going with this.  How many of us do the same thing response wise as Ellie did.  We speak what we hear.  We hear something and after hearing it so many times it becomes our truth no matter how ridiculous it sounds.  How do you think advertising works?  You are told something time and again to the spot you start believing it.  In a kids mind it turns into, “I need that.”  I am sorry to say, this isn’t just a kid thing either.  Let’s take your car or phone for example.  They are working totally fine, you are happy with them, but then you start seeing commercial after commercial of the new and eventually your mind starts buying into it, going maybe mine is getting old and needs replaced.  Maybe it isn’t a car or a phone, but a hunger issue.  You really aren’t hungry, but then you see the taco bell commercial and next thing you know you find yourself in a car heading to the drive thru.  We buy into what we hear, it becomes our truth.  

2 Timothy 4: 3-4, “Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.  They will turn away from truth and turn aside to myths.”

This is a spiritual thing also, a truth the church needs to hear.  In 2 Timothy Paul warns of a day where people will no longer stand for truth but will surround themselves with leaders who will tickle their ears.  Bottom line is, what he is saying a day will come when people no longer will stand for truth, truth will become relative to many and that will become their reality.  What is your truth?  Where do you get your truth from?  Is it from the source of truth, the Word of God or is it from what others around you are saying over and over.  

Joshua says to choose this day whom you will serve, but as for me and my house we will serve the Lord.   That includes the truth you are teaching in your home.  What are your kids hearing?  What are we allowing them to hear?  What are we hearing for ourselves?  The world’s truth that will tickle our ears and we buy into or God’s truth that stand forever.