Tag: parenting

In the moment

Posted on by Fireproof

Life has been crazy.  That may be an understatement.  Life has been absolutely chaotic.  For the last month or so it seems that we have been on the run.  Starting at the end of July we had a mission team in town with 85 middle school kids setting up worksites for them, 12 in total around the area.  Imagine with me trying to lead and setup that many worksites where you are trying to teach 12-14 year olds how to use a screw gun, read a tape measure, paint, stain, cut, use a weedwacker and so forth.  Let’s just say there is still cleanup going on from kids not knowing you don’t walk across the floor when you have paint on your shoes.  Oh the joys of leading kids.  Isn’t that part of teaching the next generation though.  Yes some of these projects adults with skill could have done in an hour or so, but are we teaching the young anything if we do it all ourselves?  Projects in our home are the same way as our 4 year old twins want to help me work on the shed.  Silas, I am proud to say actually has gotten the hang of reading a tape measure, cutting with a chop saw and using a trim nailer.  (With supervision of course.)  How many adults can say they’ve never done that before.  

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Anyway, back to the thought of life being chaotic.  After mission team we had our annual camping trip to Cowan’s Gap.  All 6 of us packed into our trailer, my in-laws and my parents all camped beside each other enjoying God’s creation.  Man talk about a week.  A day at Hershey Park, biking the battlefields at Gettysburg, fishing every chance we got.  A moment that i will never forget included Eli catching a maybe 3 inch fish and singing “I am the champion,” until he realized how small it truly was.  At that moment we all just stood on the deck cracking up as we made him take a picture with his “prized catch.

Then last weekend my dad and I got to take the boys to the NASCAR race.  It has become our yearly tradition to finish off the summer by taking the boys to the race.  A final weekend spent with just them.  The truth is the race is just he excuse to have that time with them.  To hear about the things they are learning, the memories from the summer, and also picking on them asking what girls they have been kissing lately.  Moments.  Memories.  Times to be cherished while they are still at the age they want to hang out with their dad.  Maybe this is exactly what Jesus was talking about when he speaks of life abundantly, living life to the full.  Being in the moment?

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”  John 10:10 NIV

Does it mean a lot more hours at work, and late nights after getting back to everyday life?  Absolutely.  Did I at times during those trips catch myself about everything else i needed to do when getting back.  Yes, it happened at times.  I am still human and my mind wanders, but God has been working on my heart this summer on not taking things to seriously and learning to truly be engulfed in each moment.  Embracing the times and the little snippets I might have to share with my kids the “Father’s Love.” 

This past weekend I caught myself in one of those hours of just being present.  After a long day at work I got to take the kids to a block party our at Salix Bethel Church.  They had a bubble machine setup on one end of the property and inflatable water slides on the other.  For the kids that meant cover your body in bubbles and then run back to the slides using the bubbles to fly down at full speed.  (Take a moment now to remember the joy of being a kid when nothing else mattered).  Eli during that time made it his goal to give me a big bear hug every time he ran by thinking it hilarious to see how wet he could get me.  You know what happened during that hour.  I laughed, I smiled, and I just took it all in.  I forgot about everything else.  Life to the full.

I say that to you today in hope that maybe just for a moment you would take a moment with your kids or grandkids to just be present.  Put your phone down, turn off the tv, and just laugh.  Maybe you don’t have kids in your life anymore, think back to when you were a kid ripping around on your bike, or flying down a slip and slide.  All of us need moments of joy, memories.  What if today you went outside and caught yourself letting your guard down, forgetting about all your stress for a moment.  One of my greatest memories happened when I was about 10 years old.  It was over 90 degrees out and my dad’s a/c in his car went out.  That day he was driving home from Wheeling West Virginia for work and dripping in sweat.  I will never forget him pulling in the drive, climbing out in his suit and tie and just jumping in our small inflatable pool with us and just laughing away.  Is that what you need to do today?  

Just to give you a thought in closing can you imagine Jesus doing that kind of thing when he talks about let the children come to me.  He needed a break from all the noise and chaos?  A moment to just laugh.  Maybe that is even what He did when he went to the mountain by himself to pray, just embraced being in the presence of the father,  telling Dad jokes.  Sometimes we need to loosen up.  Can you imagine God one day looking at you and going, “Why so serious?”  

Matthew 19: 14Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

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“I FORGOT”

Posted on by Fireproof

“Back up,” I say once again starting to raise my voice.  Honestly, next to I love you, those 2 words have to be the most quoted words in our home.  Our kids as soon as they turn the tv on are glued right up to it.  It is like a competition of who can be closest.  Followed by Lindsey going, “Eli, what am I about to say?”  With a shrug of the shoulders and the slow backwards walk he remarks, “I Forgot.”  No kidding this has to happen around 10 times a day with all 4 of our kids.  I can’t just pick on one of them for this story.  It is now at the point that we have downloaded an app onto our phones to act as a remote.  Without even saying a word after the third time telling them we just turn it off and take television away for a half hour.  Every so often we will get some  kickback which then turns into, “what are we going to have to do to make you remember” or “How many times must I tell you?”   To give you a glimpse into SIlas personality usually within 5 minutes will come over showing some remorse, looking up at me, saying, “I don’t know why, I just can’t remember Dad, I just forget.”  Maybe it isn’t TV that is an issue in your home, but how about brushing their teeth or feeding the pets. To all parents out there, you are not alone in having forgetful kids. The truth is even as adults we forget things way more than we’d like to admit.  

In writing this I have been completely convicted.  It is almost as if as I was writing God was showing me in real time how much I forget.  Linds gave me a list of 3 things to pick up at Walmart, even asking if I needed her to write it down.  Nope I think I got it babe, only 3 things.  Milk, Turkey Breast, toothpaste.  So here I am, start talking to someone of course, and totally forget the toothpaste.   After about 20 minutes of wandering and trying to remember I break down and call her, “Honey, what was it again?”  Then later that week we are at church listening to the announcements, thinking about certain things we should join in.  You think by the end of service I had any memory left of what it was, not a chance.  (Now get off my case, you know we all forget announcements at church).  See what I am saying though, we are all forgetful people.  

I bring all that up because I used to look at the story of the Israelites when God gave them the 10 commandments and wonder how they could be so dumb.  Literally these are the people who witnessed God part the Red Sea, send the plagues, provide quail and manna daily, lead them by a pillar of fire, and the list goes on.  Of all people you would think they would be grounded in their faith.  Now Moses comes off the mountain, declares the commandments, and they reply, “Whatever you say Lord we will do.”  Seems pretty straightforward until Moses goes back up the mountain.  How quickly the people forget, they couldn’t even remember command 1, “No other Gods before me.”  Instead they went to Aaron and asked him to create for them a god.  “WHAAAAAT?”  How quickly they forget!  

It becomes a theme throughout all of Scripture and humankind even to this day.  God moves, works, does miracles, answers prayers, and yet how quickly we forget.   When things aren’t going our way, we question if He is there.  When His answers aren’t coming fast enough to our prayers, we wonder if He hears us.  When we have a few rough days at work or look in the mirror too long we question if He still loves us, and I could go on and on.  

I would challenge you today, take a moment, and write down all that God has done for you.  Post it somewhere in your home as a reminder, like tying a string around your finger.  Remembering things, the ways that God has moved is something that is taught throughout the Bible.  In the Old Testament Joshua taught the people to set up monuments, David would write songs, while others would share them by word of mouth.  In the New Testament beyond those 3 things Jesus teaches us that in taking communion we are remembering His death, burial and resurrection leading to us having life.  Retrain your mind to remember and celebrate all that God has done for you and who He is in your life.  

“When your children ask you, ‘What are these stones to you?’ you’ll say, ‘The flow of the Jordan was stopped in front of the Chest of the Covenant of God as it crossed the Jordan—stopped in its tracks. These stones are a permanent memorial for the People of Israel.’”“

Joshua 4:6-7 MSG

“Remember this day.”  Exodus 13:3

”And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.”“

Luke 22:19

“JESUS, I BELIEVE IN YOU.”

Posted on by Fireproof

As I have shared previously, our family hot tub has turned into my prayer closet. Those moments of sitting out there at night once the kids have gone to sleep, have become invaluable. Even if it is just a couple minutes of silence from our world of chaos and noise. Recently that has changed a little bit though. With the temperatures changing and it getting colder out, all our kids have taken to it as their swimming pool. Now it seems a few nights a week, one of the girls will say as clear as can be, “hot tub, hot tub.” So who can turn down that family time right?

At first I was honestly frustrated, arguing with God, “but that is my time.” (Talk about being selfish). Honestly it turns into a comedy hour. Seriously, I encourage you now to picture yourself in this scene. All of us jammed into a 4 person inflatable hot tub, with not much room to spare. Eli trying to swim laps under everyone else’s legs, Silas acting like he is falling off the side to see how big of splash he can make. The twins learning to get their head under the water or to hold on the side while kicking their feet. Let’s just say a lot of laughter and joy takes places in these precious few moments.

Anyway, I share all that because last week I was explaining to them about it being my prayer closet; my moments to just sit and talk to Jesus. Silas then asked me if he could talk to Jesus like that. “Absolutely bud. What would you want to say to him?” His answer truly caught me off guard. “Dad, I think I would just say, Jesus I believe in you.” I really didn’t know how to respond. “Is that all you’d say or ask?” His eyes started looking around and you could tell his mind was searching, then simply, “yep, that’s all I’d say, I believe in you.”

So simple, yet so profound. What if our faith as adults was just that simple. Instead of overthinking or trying to explain everything. Instead of thinking we need magic words or long drawn out prayers. Just a simple, “Jesus, I believe in you.”

Moments like that make me truly grateful for little kids and their simple minds. I am learning to embrace the everyday conversations where God continues to teach me through my kids. Faith through the eyes of a child. Maybe that is what God will teach me more of in 2024, to have faith like a child, what about you?

“Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. So anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.”

Matthew 18:3-4 NLT

“Jesus was fully human”

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So the other morning, right after Lindsey left for work as I was getting the boys ready, God revealed himself to me in a completely new way.  To be honest it was in a way that I have never thought of before.  While Silas was walking across the floor, I caught Eli running up right behind him, bear hugging him and then falling down backwards taking Silas with him.  And so it began.  Silas burst out laughing and I mean like all out hyaena laughs, as deep as belly laughs as I have ever heard a baby have.  Now you might be thinking at this point as a good dad I should intervene but honestly all I could do was stand there laughing myself.  Then Silas would get back up, and Eli would pull him back down.  This time though Silas landed right on top of him, rolled over and seemed to pin him.  Here was our 1 year old fighting back.  I really wanted to get down and pul the old www, !., 2, 3, Ding, Ding, Ding.  I think we might have 2 wrestlers on our hands.  But then it turned and the fun was over Eli got Silas pinned down and the laughing started to turn to a whimper.

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You know me though, as my day went on I started thinking about the reality that Jesus himself had a brother, James.  In my mind I started thinking about Joseph standing over Jesus and James as they went at it as kids.  Can you imagine Mary looking at Joseoph and saying to him, “I thought we were raising the Son of God?”  And Joseph replying by saying, “He is, remember what the angel said, but that doesnt’t mean he’s not still a kid.” I can only imagine the fights between the boys, the disagreements that took place, the tears that were shed, and the discipline that had to be dished out.    How about the time when Jesus wandered off from his parents and He stayed at the temple while Mary and Joseph searched for him.  Think there might have been some belts being cracked that day?

Luke 2: 43 After the festival was over, while his parents were returning home, the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem, but they were unaware of it.

Maybe you haven’t thought to much about this before, but please if you get anything from this, remember that Jesus truly was fully human.  He left the comforts of heaven, humbled himself, took on the form of a man, was born in a manger and lived and breathed just like you and me.  So next time you think to yourself and shake your fist to the sky saying, “God you don’t know what I am going through,” remember that he does.  When you say, “You dont know what it’s like to be betrayed,” He is saying, “I had everyone turn there back on me.”  When you are saying, “You don’t know how hard it is to forgive that person, He is saying, “How hard do you think it was for me to forgive the soldiers who nailed me to the cross.  When you are thinking, “You don’t know the temptation I am going through, he reminds you of his time in the desert being tempered directly by Satan himself.  You seeing my point yet?

Phillipians 2:6-7 Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form.

What a way to start my day.  Thank you Jesus for the simple reminder that you were fully hunan, yet fully God at the same time.  Thank You God for my two boys who give me that simple reminder.

Imitation

Posted on by Fireproof

Follow Me as I follow Christ.  1 Corinthians 11:1

Imitate:  Take or follow as a model.

You want to know some of the habits and traits that you have?  You want to know how other people see the things you are doing?  Then have a child.  You truly never understand some of the quirks that you have until you see your son start to act the same way and do the same things.  In some ways this is awesome, but then other times you want to scream and say to them, “Where did you learn that?  Did Mommy teach you that?”

The more you watch these habits though, the more you realize you are the one who is guilty of these actions your son is now imitating.  In the same sense though it can be an unbelievable thing when you see your son picking up on things you do that make you as a dad super proud.

Linds and I have always been ones to stop and pray before we eat.  We gather around the island in the kitchen with Eli up in his highchair.   So here we are grabbing hands, closing our eyes, and thanking God for the food before us.  After a few weeks of this we begin to notice Eli starting to do the same thing.  He is about 8 months old, grabbing our hands and closing his eyes.  Now at this age, he is at the point where he will get up in his highchair, look at us and say, “PWAY” as he closes his eyes and folds his hands.  We didn’t teach him that, he caught it from us.

Another example is with Linds cleaning up the house.  Eli loves being like mommy, go into the closet and get the Swiffer out himself as Linds gets the vacuum out.  He sees her cleaning and he wants to help, to the point he has his own cleaning tools.

Sometimes, this can be incredible to watch and makes you extremely proud. Other times, it can drive you nuts to be completely honest.  Last week, I was trying to paint in the hall.  So here I am, on the stepladder, trying to reach the high spots.  As I’m up there, I start hear a dripping behind me.  My first thought was we must have a water leak so I start searching for it.  Nothing, thank goodness.  Then I look down and see Eli smiling away, a second paintbrush in his hand with brown paint up to the handle.  He is shaking it up and down making a painting motion as paint flung all over the hallway, down the front of him, through his hair and all over the floor.  I wanted to get mad but all I could do was laugh, because he just imitating his daddy.  So I called for Linds and she came in helping me get him cleaned up.  We learned the valuable lesson to keep things such as paintbrushes high and out of his reach.

One of the craziest ways I have seen Eli imitate Lindsey and I is in our words.  We have a 100 lb lab/st. bernard mix puppy (or bear to many) and he has to be one of the neediest dogs ever.  I swear it is nonstop whining and crying, wanting in and out.  There are times when Eli will be crying, Bomber wants out and all you can do is mumble something at him telling him in a subtle way to go sit down and hush up.  The next thing you know Eli is saying the same exact thing, “hush, hush.”  He hears our words and then starts repeating them, like we have our own little parrot in the room.  What words are we teaching him?

It has truly been a lesson for me though in being an example for him in my faith.  If I want to see him become a man of prayer, I have to be that example of a man who prays myself.  If I want to see him learn to read Scripture, I better be reading it myself.  If I want to see Eli learn to be a man who cares for others, who gives, who leads, and the list goes on, I better be ready to allow him to see my example.  Like the old saying goes, “more is caught than taught.”

I can only imagine Eli saying to me one day, “Well dad, I don’t see you doing those things.” How convicting would that be for you?  I know my heart would break.  I want to be that example for my child. How about you?

Now when we are at the church, during worship, I will holding Eli in my arms and he will raise his hands over his head.  What a moment for a dad, he may not be able to sing yet or know the words, but he has seen his daddy and mommy in worship raising their hands.

cross

I believe that is exactly what Paul is talking about here is this passage, saying to the Corinthians, look at my example.  Follow me as I follow.  I can only imagine the Corinthian people looking at him and saying, “but Paul we don’t see that example in you.”  He had to live what he taught himself.

We live in a culture now though where we use the excuse or the line, “do as I say, not as I do.”  It doesn’t work that way with kids.  They learn what they see.  They do as you do.  Good and bad.

One final thought though, is for someone to imitate you they have to spend time with you.  For you to imitate Christ, you have to spend time with Him.  You want your kids to learn to spend time with Christ, you have to learn what that means yourself and set that example.  Imitation comes from being around someone, watching them, and doing as they do.

I can only wait and see the things that Eli picks up on from Linds and I’s example.  I hope and pray most of what he does will be good traits but I know along the way we will fail at times, so please take a moment and pray for us as we try and be an example for him and for others.  While you’re at it, pray for the example you ‘re being.

“CRY OUT TO ME.”

Posted on by Fireproof

                “For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” Romans 8:15

As Eli has been growing, I have started to notice that he has different cries, different sounds he makes based on what he is feeling or going through.  For you parents out there, you know what I am talking about.  First there is the “I am hungry” cry, a louder, feisty type cry.  Then there is the “I am tired,”  “fighting sleep cry, where he is rubbing his eyes, yawning, barely keeping his eyes open but screaming at the top of his lungs because he doesn’t want to miss anything.  Then there is the “I am bored,” tired of being stuck in the carseat, get me outta here cry, which if ignored can turn into an all out ear piercing noise.  How about the “diaper needs changed” cry, not really a way to describe that one until you have experienced it firsthand.

In all these different cries it is Eli’s way of reaching out to tell us something is wrong.  As I listen to him cry, I catch myself going Eli, just talk to me, tell me what is up.  I don’t understand what these different noises mean.  Talk to me bud, Talk to me.  Then he starts to reach out to me, crawl over to my leg and grab on, pulling himself up my shin, just reaching up.  I just wish he could tell me what was actually taking place within his body, let me know what his pain was, or what was causing his discomfort  As he cries, All I can do is reach down, pick him up and hold him.  Guess what, most times that is exactly what he want.  He wants his daddy and mommy!

crying

What if that is exactly how we are designed to be when it comes to God.  What if we were meant to just cry out to him, to speak to him, to tell him what is taking place in our lives.  As Christians, many of us would probably say, yeah I get that, we are called to pray, but how many of us actually do it in our times of need.  What if when we are hurt, or in pain, or even just seeking purpose we would just reach up and cry out.

I believe it is exactly what God is asking of us, for us to tell him what is taking place, and allowing Him to reach down, to pick us up and just hold us.    We may feel like what we are going through is not that big of a deal so we don’t want to bother God with it.  Look back at that verse in Romans 8, God wants to be your “DADDY,” he wants you to talk to him about what is taking place in your life.  He wants you to turn to him, to run to him.  He isn’t just an image in the sky or some dictator pointing down at you saying. “I caught you again.”  He is your heavenly father saying, “just talk to me.”  Maybe our issue is that we think we need just the right words for God, to make him understand our situation, like if we say it just right, or add a couple thee’s and thou’s to our prayers.  I know I have been there before where I feel like my prayers are hitting the ceiling and I look up and just shake my fist saying, “God, are you hearing me?”  Okay, if that prayer didn’t work, lets try and reword it a little bit, then maybe He will hear it sooner.  If that is you, please consider this verse.

               “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” Romans 8:26

It is not about the words we use though, like I said, He just desires us to cry out.  To hit our knees, to reach up, and allow Him to do what he does best.  As our heavenly Father, He reaches down, picks us up, and says, “I got this, Trust me my child.”

“He gave His son.”

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John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that he gave His one and only son, that whoever would believe in Him would not perish, but have eternal life.”

A verse many of us know and probably memorized growing up.  Have you really ever thought of the depth of it though.  (Honestly, I hadn’t until Eli was born, and the depth continued to grow deeper with each of our kids.)  It was just another verse in Scripture that I would recite during a service or someone would speak on and I would go, “yeah I’ve heard this message before.”

This year though is different, as I think upon Easter and look back at pictures of Eli sleeping in my arms these few words make me want to break down.   Looking at his face, recognizing his innocence makes me realize how much I have taken God’s love for granted.  It feels like a major slap in the face from God as I try and process what this verse really means for you and me.  (I am going to ask you to let your emotions run a little bit now and maybe even shed some tears.  Let God stir your heart.)

A new translation of this verse keeps coming to my mind, “For God so loves the world, that he sacrificed His one and only.  For God so loves Josh, for God so loves Eli, for God so loves you.”

Could I personally give up Eli if it meant saving others?  If it meant saving the world?  I would like to think I would give up my own life for those I cherish, but I can’t imagine sacrificing my child.

In our country we have men and women who will sign up for our military knowing the sacrifice that may be required of them.  To give up our own lives many of us would say we would do it without a doubt.  “God, I will sign MY name on the dotted line, but to give up my kids, you don’t know what you’re asking.”  Can you imagine God asking of us to give up our child’s life to save our city, our church, others, strangers even.

I am truly struggling with this thought right now.  I know I care for others, I even love others, but I can’t fathom the depth of love it would take to offer any of my kids up for others.  To willingly watch them suffer, to see the pain in their face,  to see their blood shed.  I don’t think, actually if I’m going to be blunt, I know I couldn’t do it.

12374871_1098178626889792_5569784334676026566_oI can only imagine Eli crying out, “Daddy, this hurts.  Daddy, Help.  Daddy, if there is any other way, please.”  Yet, God in his infinite love for you and me, allowed Jesus, His son, to go through this agony.

Now my mind is racing thinking upon this thought of God’s love, the wheels are spinning in my mind, the smoke is pouring out from my brain as I consider this.   My thoughts now turn from God’s love to how much Jesus himself loves you and me.  The love he must have had, that He would willingly lay down his own life, out of submission to His Father’s plan.

John 15:13, “Greater Love has no one than this, to lay down his life for his friends.”

That he would be the perfect example of the verse he shared with his disciples. The reality hits that Jesus didn’t just talk about this type of love that he had for others.  He didn’t just offer up some kind words and say,  “do as I say, not as I do.”  He actually lived it.  When he talked about laying down His life, it didn’t just sound good, he actually did it.  When he talked about forgiveness, he followed through, “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”

Jesus lived out what he taught.  He is the ultimate example.

I want to be the same way for my kids, I want to live out what I say.  I want to be an example of love.  I want to be an example of forgiveness.

This Easter take time and consider God’s love, Christ’s example, and what it means to you.  I know I personally will never celebrate Easter the same way again.

In closing there is a worship song out that we all have probably sung, “Oh how he loves us.”  Take a moment, think upon those words from the perspective of a DAD.

Fearfully and Wonderfully made

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November 30, 2015

It had been a normal day for us, at least as normal as it could be when your wife is days away from giving birth.  We were now at the point of weekly doctor visits and ultrasounds.  We were dealing with the sleepless nights as well as Lindsey getting to the point of “just get this kid out of me already.”  That afternoon we went and had her appointment, they did some bloodwork and told us everything looked good, and that the following Monday they would induce her for the baby to be born.  So we went home and started our day.  We decided it was probably a good idea to go ahead and decorate for Christmas because once Eli was born we figured nothing would get done.  So that afternoon we went out and bought a Christmas tree, came home, got some dinner, and got to work.  Feeling a little exhausted, at around 10 or so we decided it was time to call it a night.  The tree was up, the lights and ornaments were hung, so if nothing else, at least  that was done.

As we went to go to bed we grabbed our phones and both noticed we had voicemails from an unknown number.  Linds decided to check hers first, and as she did the tears started to flow.  I had no clue why, but she went on to tell me it was a message from her doctor saying to get to the emergency room as soon as possible.   WHAT???? We were just at your office this afternoon and you told us everything was good.  On the way to the E.R. we were able to get a hold of the doctor who told us for some reason that night she couldn’t sleep, so she got up and chose to go over test results once again.  As she went over Lindsey’s numbers one more time, she noticed that according to the data, Linds was going into preclampsia and that her liver was shutting down.  Not quite the news we expected.  Now I don’t usually freak out, but that night, I may have a little bit, especially as we get to the hospital and they are waiting for us and begin telling us all the medications they were going to put her on as well as test to be run.  All I remember is them saying, “This one is for seizures, this one is for blood pressure, this one is for this, this one is for that.”  Seizures, High blood pressure,  and the list went on…. Yeah I got a little scared.

So I did all that I know to do, I began to pray.  During that night the Lord continued leading me to Psalms 139 and I just kept reciting it over and over.  Through it I learned just how true the words are that this child, that we had prayed for, was truly in God’s hands.  He knew all the emotions I was going through and none of this was catching him off guard.  I didn’t know all the answers or how everything was going to turn out, but I knew God kept saying “He is my child, even before you knew of his existence, I had already been planning his life.  Every aspect, every detail… is in my hands.”

YOU HAVE SEARCHED ME, LORD,
AND YOU KNOW ME.
2 YOU KNOW WHEN I SIT AND WHEN I RISE;
YOU PERCEIVE MY THOUGHTS FROM AFAR.

3 YOU DISCERN MY GOING OUT AND MY LYING DOWN;
YOU ARE FAMILIAR WITH ALL MY WAYS.

4 BEFORE A WORD IS ON MY TONGUE
YOU, LORD, KNOW IT COMPLETELY.

13 FOR YOU CREATED MY INMOST BEING;
YOU KNIT ME TOGETHER IN MY MOTHER’S WOMB.

14 I PRAISE YOU BECAUSE I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE;
YOUR WORKS ARE WONDERFUL,
I KNOW THAT FULL WELL.

15 MY FRAME WAS NOT HIDDEN FROM YOU
WHEN I WAS MADE IN THE SECRET PLACE,
WHEN I WAS WOVEN TOGETHER IN THE DEPTHS OF THE EARTH.

16 YOUR EYES SAW MY UNFORMED BODY;
ALL THE DAYS ORDAINED FOR ME WERE WRITTEN IN YOUR BOOK
BEFORE ONE OF THEM CAME TO BE.

All I could do was pray and trust.  As the hours past, her blood pressure would rise, machines would beep, heartrate would go up and all i could do was sit there helpless, watching and waiting.  Then the guy with the epidoral came in and he just wanted to talk, and on and on he went.  All I kept thinking was, “dude, help my wife.”

IMG_4257Labor went on for a little over 13 hours and then our little miracle, Eli Miycah was born.  Healthy as could be, but man did I have a scare put into me over the whole thing.  Not only a scare but a whole new perspective over the passages that David wrote so many years ago about each child being fearfully and wonderfully made.

Every aspect, every detail is in the hands of a mighty God.   What an awesome and mighty God we serve.  And the reality that truly hit home that night is that even if something happened that night, that God is still in control.  Not a moment went by that he was unaware of.